Well here it is, like overly dramatic truth.

Sooo....

I wrote this beautiful blog on the train earlier. It was close to being finished, and I planned to post it tonight. Nope. Never happened. It took exactly 30 seconds from the time I stepped foot onto the red dirt of Oklahoma for something stupid to wreck my train of thought. It started with my cell phone (big shock). Since it had a great signal off the train, it began rattling in my pocket. I ignored it because I just knew it would be bullshit and I wanted to be as pure as possible in my heart so I could share the magical moment of being reunited with my Adam.

In his truest, grandiose Libra fashion, Adam spotted me from across the parking lot, opened his arms wide, and came running into my mirrored, needy/dramatic, Cancer/Leo stance, for an embrace worthy of prime time TV. Don't believe me? Just ask Brandi. She was there. She saw it all go down.

After the theatrical hug, we got into the car and I waited until Adam's inevitable pass-out before I checked my phone. Sure enough, it was something I wasn't in the mood to deal with tonight. It was a text from Oklahoma Ryan. (Not to be confused with Ryan Roberts <3, who lives in Texas.)


OKLAHOMA RYAN: Its crazy that we used to talk all the time and now we never talk at all.

LIZ: It's not crazy. It was you.


Last week Oklahoma Ryan got mad at me because I didn't return his texts at 4am. Let it be known, unless I'm burning the 4am oil, I will NOT text or call you back. I don't care who you are. Unless someone is DEAD or DYING, there's no reason a text or call must be promptly returned. ESPECIALLY at 4am.

In the midst of returning Oklahoma Ryan's barrage of text messages, I accidentally sent one of the texts to Ryan Roberts. Yay! Now he's going to wake up first thing in the morning and see the text. I'm sure he'll return it with a, "WTF are you talking about?" Scenarios like tonight are part of the reason I loathe coming back to Oklahoma. However, Ryan Roberts did say when the moment struck, I should get these raw emotions and experiences out, and into words.

Well here it is, like overly dramatic truth.

It's my fault. I should have ignored the texts altogether because I think the entire situation is ridiculous and a complete waste of time. I wanted to be a good friend and listen to Oklahoma Ryan's reasons for being upset with me last weekend, but I'm just not in the mood for it. Not tonight, and after this, I don't know if I want to reconcile the friendship at all. Its starting to feel like its more trouble than what its worth, which is never a good sign. So bring on the anesthetics! I'm ready to pass out and forget this unnecessarity.
(Yes, I realize that's not a word. I just made it up.)

Maybe Adam was onto something with his immediate slumber?

If I ever feel better
Remind me to spend some good time with you
You can give me your number
When it's all over I'll let you know.
--Phoenix/If I Ever Feel Better