"That's life," I said to him.

Packing and getting ready for the trip home for a few days. So excited to see everyone! What's awesome about this trip home is that I'm not going at it alone. My younger brother, (who now doubles as my full-time bodyguard), is tagging along with me. Though he's always happy to share brother/sister quality time with me, his reasons for coming aren't rooted within the same overzealous garden my ideas are planted.

He's convinced someone is going to abduct me and kill me. I'm sure part of that has to do with the past year, along with our father's passing. I think he's anxious that I'm just going to up and die on him, out of the blue. Some days I fear the same thing, but I'm a survivor and I've proven this to everyone, including him and myself, time and time again.

Aside from the guy who followed me for blocks asking me for sex, the last time I was in a taxi I was taken on a 40 minute hell ride by a driver who claimed he didn't know the city. With that being said, I suppose my little brother has a good argument regarding my safety. In my own precocious mind, I’ve gone over several reasons as to why I've encountered dangerous situations like being solicited for sex, etc.. Is it just normal for a young woman to have to worry about her safety in a metropolis? Is it my size? My naivety? All of the above?

Its all of the above.

Particularly concerning my naivety, you’d think I’d start acting like a total bitch to keep people frightened of hurting or taking advantage of me. But no, that isn’t me. It’s not my style. Life is about experiencing the good + the bad. We celebrate the good and hope there’s plenty more where it came from. We take the bad, and if you’re resourceful, you apply it into a lesson learned and move on.

Are the above mentioned incidents the last time someone will ever try to take advantage of me? Nope. HELL NO. Am I going to let them scar me forever? I’ll do my best to try not to let them hinder me. If I kept myself guarded 24/7, I’d keep out the bad and inevitably, I’d also block out the good. I may never end up hurt by the "build walls around me" method, perhaps, but I’d also never get pleasantly surprised either.

In between the assholes I meet on a daily basis, I meet really amazing people. In between the shitty situations I find myself in, I've also experienced a multitude of irreplaceable moments I wouldn’t trade for anything.

"That’s life," I said to him.

My little brother applauded my positive attitude, but he still isn’t convinced.

[current song]
Where you'll find me - Neutral Milk Hotel