That's the beauty in, "what it is".

RUSS: They're like a gang of pirates on the west side.
LIZ: That's what you really want me to write for the press release?
You want me to refer to Eighth Circuit's following as, 'a gang of pirates'?
RUSS: It's the truth! It is what it is, girl.
LIZ: That's gonna be your quote of the year.
RUSS: What's that? 'Gang of pirates'?
LIZ: 'On the west side'.
RUSS: Exactly. Like I said; It is what it is.

I had the pleasure of catching up with Mr. Russ, [guitarist for Fort Worth, TX based band Eighth Circuit], this afternoon at Mi Cocina. The sun wasn't quite at it's highest peak in the sky so we were able to catch up without being forced to squint at each other during our afternoon on-the-patio rendezvous.  Russ and I talked and listened equally throughout our visit and as usual, I watched him devour the food on his plate while I tinkered around with my entree.

It doesn't matter who it is, I hesitate to allow another human being witness me tearing a meal up as if it were my last. This exclusion includes myself, too.

After our picturesque lunch date and exchange of life updates, Russ walked me back to work, and we hugged it out before I walked back into the employee entrance of the building where I work. Most of the time Russ and I spend together is rushed and brief, but I'm always left with a sense of calm after talking to him. Though today our visit was a partial goodbye-for-now, the feeling I had after we parted ways still made me smile for the rest of the day.

I have to admit I've grown attached to his positive presence in my life and I wasn't ready to tell him goodbye-for-now. But his parting words of encouragement regarding my summer plans gave me a boost of reassurance and confidence in my recent decision, so saying goodbye wasn't too tragic. What decision am I speaking about, exactly?

I decided to go back to Oklahoma for the summer to workshop the book/script project I've been working on the past year.

I came to the decision about a month ago, gave my notice to the HR department at my workplace, then solidified my choice yesterday when I gave my boss my two weeks notice. Much to my surprise my employer is supportive of this decision and allowed me to take the option of a leave-of-absence so I can come back to work with them when I move back to Texas in August.

With so much running smoothly along my newly chosen path, it's hard not to anticipate some speed bumps along the way. I can't help but feel anxious because I'm used to things falling apart. As negative as that sounds, I have to be honest with myself.

It is what it is, I suppose.

Regardless of my fear of my own failure, I'm excited about this summer. Daniel, my art twin, is coming back from his journey in San Fransisco, to work with me on the project in Oklahoma this summer. I say excited but the better phrase to use would be fucking ecstatic. I'm fucking ecstatic to see Daniel again and work with him, sharing the pursuit of making this art vision; something I've only dreamed about; into a reality.

Daniel isn't the only piece helping this puzzle see it's completion. Ms. Jana has helped me along this path for the past few months and will be traveling with us for the summer on our ARTventure. I'm truly honored and gracious that she is willing to be part of this ARTdeavor. Outside of our work, I'm also proud to say that she's one of my best friends too.

There's still a ton of planning that needs to be mapped out and I have a few more goodbye-for-now's that I need to say in the next couple of weeks before I leave Texas for the summer. I worry that I won't be able to get everything done but I have faith that the path will work itself out along the way. It always does, even when it doesn't go exactly as planned.

That's the beauty in what it is, I suppose.

I got plenty of time
You got light in your eyes
And you're standing here beside me
Out of the passing of time
Never for money, always for love<3
[HOME]
is where I want to be
But I guess I'm already there
  THIS must be the place
I can't tell one from another
Did I find you or did you find me?
If someone asks
THIS is where I'll be

-- This Must be the Place/TALKING HEADS